Mindfulness, writing and Women Make Stories with Daniela Bragato
I’m really excited to introduce today’s guest, Daniela, who is the founder of Women Make Stories - where she teaches mindfulness and writing, and where she helps women to tell their stories. We talked about what brought Daniela to this work, how she juggles running a business alongside part-time work and the importance of sharing our unique point of view.
Things we talked about:
Working through fear and taking the leap into starting a business alongside part-time work
The power of shared stories and why you need to share your story
Journaling, how to start, and the significance and power of cultivating a journaling practice
Mindfulness and how it can help your business as well as your writing
You can find Daniela here:
Website - womenmakestories.com
FULL TRANSCRIPT (computer generated):
0:02
You're listening to business in bloom podcast for creative female entrepreneurs, and a home to honest conversations about the ups and downs of running your own business. I'm your host and self belief business coach Anna Dunleavy, and we'll explore topics on self doubt, following your intuition and why self limiting beliefs might be holding you back. Hello, hello and welcome back to Episode 82. You are listening to business in bloom previously known as the peerless hustle collective. I am really excited to introduce today's guest Daniella, who is the founder of women make stories, where she teaches mindfulness and writing and where she helps women to tell their stories. We talked about what brought Daniella to this work, how she juggles running a business alongside part time work, and the importance of sharing our unique point of view. So let's dive right in. Hi, Daniela, thank you so much for joining me today. Why don't we start with you just introducing yourself and telling us a little bit about what it is that you do?
1:05
I know, thanks so much for having me. It's actually my first podcast. So I'm so honoured to be here. And as teacher and the founder of women make stories, which is a purpose like business that offers writing and mindfulness workshops, and one to one sessions to women.
1:22
Amazing. So what I would love to hear a little bit more about, I guess, is the story and that kind of journey to you know where you are now. And how did the business really start first, perhaps? Yes, sure. So I officially officially launched the business in September 2020. But I always say that the business kind of like started in my head way before that. So I always knew that I wanted to work for myself for a long time. But I had like so many ideas, and I just couldn't really narrow that down. And then I think at the time, like I wasn't even sure whether that was possible for me to kind of like create a career on my own and for myself. But then in 2018 my career to kind of like a different term. And so since graduating, so I have a degree in creative and professional writing. And I've always worked in communications. And then in 2018, I just felt like really stuck in this job. And I wasn't happy and and for me, that was a really pivotal moment because I knew, okay, this is something is happening here. I was also like, sick all the time. So I felt like my body and my mind were kind of like telling me that I needed to change. And yes, I was going through quite a lot of things. And then at the time as well, I was introduced to mindfulness. And I started to kind of like practice mindfulness for myself as well. And I could see the benefit that it had on my on myself. And I also decided at the time to kind of like, go out of my little bubble and attend careers events for women in the creative industry. And that was really helpful because I just kind of like sat there and listened to women's stories. And all of a sudden, I thought, Oh, it's not just me, kind of like going through all of these issues. I just felt like less lonely. Understood. And I remember like, there was one night where I kind of like, I left that building. And I felt like so inspired by the stories I've heard. And again, that was kind of like, I know, it sounds like a cliche, but that's where I had like my lightbulb. And I was like, I know what I want to do. Like it's so clear in my head. And from there, I kind of like planted the seed or women make stories. I was like, Okay, I know the direction I want to combine mindfulness and writing, I really want to create something that plays with my strengths. So yeah, and then since then, I kind of like worked on it, like slowly, slowly, did like all my mindfulness qualifications and other things to help me. So yeah, I guess that's how it all started.
4:12
Yeah, I love that you were really kind of obviously you attended some, like career events. And that that was the real inspiration. And I guess that almost, in a sense, maybe permission slip to be that actually, other people do this too. And so yeah, you can go for it.
4:33
Yeah, yeah, that was incredible. Like the stories I heard and talking to other women as well, like attendees as well. You know, I'm a bit of a shy person. So I was like, Oh, I don't know how it's gonna be. But everybody was like super welcoming. eek, tell them in a day or wanted to share their stories. And, you know, there was so much that resonated with me. And it was just very encouraging. And yeah, I think it was also about knowing that you I'm not alone in those struggles. It was very important for me at the time to know, okay, I'm not the only one that feels stuck that feels like unhappy. And there are so many women out there. So I think my response was, what can I do as well to help myself and to help other women? So that's also why I want to see create women make stories as well.
5:21
I love that. And I think there is so much power and kind of listening to other people's stories. And knowing and realising that you're not alone in you know, the struggles that you might be going through. And I think that's actually sometimes probably one of the biggest things actually, isn't it? It's kind of like, it's almost feels like that weight off your shoulders a little bit. Because it's like, oh, okay, I'm not, you know, I'm not alone. And other people have experienced this and have worked through it. And so it kind of again, it just reiterate that you're able to do that, too.
5:58
Yeah, exactly. gives you so much courage, I think. Yeah, yeah. And a different perspective. Yeah.
6:04
Absolutely. And so I'm curious whether hearing these stories, you know, women who run their own businesses, did that have kind of a, an impact on on, you know, creating women make stories? Or? Or was that already kind of a seed that had been planted? You know, perhaps before?
6:27
Um, yeah, it definitely had like a big impact, although I knew that I wanted to do something with the writing, because that's always been my passion. And I felt very frustrated in certain industries and jobs, because I wasn't creative enough. I think, you know, the word of communication at change dramatically since I started. And I've always been passionate about stories, like my first job, when I was working for universities was actually to go out and interview students or interview like academics, finding out their stories. And then like, the best ways to kind of like, translate their stories. And then all of a sudden, everything changed, because he was all about digital marketing, it was all about like, KPIs, and it was different. And as much as you try to kind of like learn new skills, I was like, Well, I'm not really writing that much. Like, what about the stories? You know, what about listening to them, and I remember, like, it was so good to sit down and listen to other people's streams. And, you know, all the students coming from different countries, it was just so I was so grateful to be in that job. So I really missed this, this element of stories and storytelling. And so then, when I was in that room, listening to women stories, I was like, Yes, you know, this makes sense. Again, you know, I need to go back to this roots. So yeah, it kind of like gave me the inspiration and say, yes, this is what I wanted to do. Like, I've always wanted to do this. And it's Yeah, like you said, a bit of a validation. Yes, you know, I can do this, it makes sense. It's important to do this to share stories, and to give women the space to actually feel comfortable to share their own stories if they want to, and to write about them. So yeah, I guess it was super important.
8:23
So you lead me on to my next question very nicely. But I wanted to ask about the kind of importance of women sharing their stories. And what is that? About that specifically, that you're so passionate about? I suppose and, and I guess my other question, is that what happens when we open up and share our story with others?
8:48
Yeah, so I think because I've studied creative writing, and most of my lectures were women, which was incredible as well, they always encouraged us to, to share our story and write about our stories. And they always said, you know, your story is worth telling. And it's important. So I always want to kind of like reiterate this message every time I do my workshops, or, you know, when I write about stories on my social media as well, because it's so important that we know that our stories are important, and that we don't need other people to validate our stories or our experiences. And, you know, we see this happening so many times that, you know, women's stories are kind of like played down or not believed or, and I think we have to kind of like, as much as we can actually say, No, we exist, we're here, we have a story, whatever that is, and whatever we, you know, whether we decided to publish that stories, or just to keep it for our own eyes. It doesn't matter. It's equally important that we continue to write or express ourselves in you know, whatever way we want to express ourselves because it could be like through painting or colouring or photography, you know, that's always Telling stories for me. And yeah, I think it's just incredibly important to that women know about this and that we continue to reinforce this message. And then we don't listen to those people that kind of like gave us this advice that we don't want that, you know, our stories and importance or, you know, we were not able to tell our stories or our story isn't good enough. And I think it's kind of like to stress at times, it could be external people and at times, you know, we can be a bit harsh on ourselves, you know, our inner critic say, No, you know, why are you writing this? Why are you wasting time? You know, you're not good enough. So it's like, we have to fight your battles here. But in the Yeah, I think it's just super important and sharing stories, it's important as well, because although as women, I feel like we have, we go through similar issues at times. And we have so much in common, so many elements, and stories, you know, are universal, so we can always learn from other people. But at the same time, I think it's important that we remember that we're all unique. And as women as well, we're all unique. So as much as I hear your story, and I can feel like Oh, yes, I can see myself in your story, then I also need to understand that you are never be you are never fully understand your struggle. So it's important that I hear from me that I hear your point of view that I hear like, that's, you know, we hear multiple stories, multiple point of views, multiple voices. Because Yeah, stories are universal, but they're also unique. And I think it's important that you know, as women, we know that we're here for other women, we're here to listen to them, not to judge them when we hear their stories, you know, it's important that we know that women are supported. Yeah. And I think through stories and through sharing, we learn a lot. We feel inspired. You know, we never really know, when we tell our stories, you know, there's always somebody that wants the needs to hear that story, right? We never really know how much we touch other people. Yeah. So I think as women, it's important that we are reminded about this as much as we can, you know, because our stories are powerful. And I think women's stories can really change existing narratives as well. So, yeah, I'm like, always encouraging women, tell your story, if that's what you want, and don't be afraid, in its own that story.
12:32
I think you've touched on something that kind of comes up in, you know, the conversations that I have. And when I listened to other women talk, that very often we feel like our story doesn't isn't worth telling, or perhaps that we kind of question ourselves whether, you know, there's anything of value that we might have to add. And so I guess I'm curious, I'm What do you say to those people who are kind of like, Oh, I don't know if I have anything to say, because perhaps it doesn't feel like my story is particularly interesting enough, or whatever the excuse, it might, you know, it might be that we give?
13:11
Well, I would argue that because we all have so many stories to tell. You know, and sometimes it's true. Like, I think if that inner critic that thinks, oh, I don't have anything to say, but that's not not true at all. We all have, like, so many different episodes that happen in our life that are so rich, you know, we have so much about our own stories, our childhood, whatever, you know, all those leaders stories that happen to us every day. And it's just so important that we write about them that we reflect on them, because all of those little stories that ultimately kind of like shape you as a person, and all the people that you've met, or the things that you do in your everyday or, you know, in the past as well. Those are the little stories that then kind of like, create also who you are, you know, they they you learned from the stories, or the stories that you know, your parents told you as well, like, everything kind of like inform you as a person. So I don't I don't believe that we don't have a story that's not worth telling.
14:21
It kind of links back to what you said earlier about our unique kind of points of view, right? Because we all have different lived experiences. And even though there are many common themes that we can relate to, we've also perhaps had very unique kind of perspectives and takes on on things because of our lived experience. So like he talked about, you know, the kind of childhood and childhood experiences and various things we all have. Yeah, we all have different kind of really a different lens that we're looking at the life through right
15:00
Exactly. And I think that if you think about it, this is just one. I think in itself, this is already a reason, a very, very good reason to just tell your story. Because you are unique, there is any like, you know, you, nobody can be like you. So, you know, for all the things that make you unique, your story, your background, the lens through which you see the word. That's your story, you know. So I think that is the number one reason why your story is yours. And nobody can tell your story better than you. So yeah, absolutely. Every stories worth telling. Yeah,
15:40
I love that. So I'm curious, then whether you can help us or for anyone who would like to tell their story, or even, you know, really kind of just dip their toe in, in that world? What can they do? And how can they start? How can they make a stop?
15:57
Big question. I guess. So for me writing stories, it's kind of like two ways. So of course, there is like the journaling or writing for well being you know, depending how you want to call it, but there is like that element of writing. And then there is like the creative writing. So you know, whether you you write poems or you know, a novel or a short stories, and I kind of I do both in between, I love doing both at different times. So it really depends what you feel like called to do whether you just want to kind of like journal. And I mean, there are so many different prompts. One thing, I think, if you're just at the start that can help with your journaling, it's just free writing, I think for your writing is just really, really good. Because there are no rules at all. It's literally literally just you and your pen, if you like to write with a pen and paper, that's how I love to write, because I just feel it's more, I don't know, I just really love the connection of like writing down and I like the income and paper and stuff. It makes it that experience a bit different to me, rather than just typing on my computer. So I think free writing is great. Because Yeah, there are no rules, you don't have to make perfect sense. Didn't have to follow like grammar at all. It's just you and your thoughts. Just kind of like, Okay, I've got a blank page, and I can just jot down all my thoughts, whatever is going on in my head, I'll just put it down on paper. Yeah, and that's just really easy. You know, you don't have to do anything else. Although I know that sometimes people feel stuck with the beginning. But you can just start by, you know, today I'm feeling and you start with your feeling. Or I'm here today, and this is how, you know, and this is what I want to write about. And sometimes the repetition, I know it sounds silly, but sometimes, like if you repeat the same sentence a few times, that can help you and can prompt you to actually write a bit more. So yeah, I guess people sometimes get a bit scared of the over blank page. I know that can be scary. But I always try to reframe the blank page with, okay, this is my canvas of possibilities. I can do whatever I want. It's just it's just possibility for me, you know, so whitespace, but it means possibility, you know, I can do whatever I want with it. And that really helps me.
18:13
Yeah. And I think I guess that, you know, blank canvas and possibility means that you can't get it wrong. Yeah, you know, it's, yeah, you're you can do whatever you like. And if you absolutely hate it, you know, you also have the permission to tear it up, or fernet or whatever. Whatever way you'd want to get rid of it. But I'm glad that you mentioned kind of unit because I think when I first came across free writing, I was like, but what do I do? It felt like the no roles aspect to it was almost too far, like too much freedom in a sense, because I was still kind of unclear, but like, you know, what do I write about? And what should it look like? And do the sentences have to be perfectly formed? Or can I just literally, you know, write whatever comes to mind. And it That in itself felt like a bit of a stumbling block almost. But once I got over that, and just allowed myself just to, you know, write down, whatever that comes to mind and whatever felt right in that moment, I think, as you practice, and I guess it's a practices into as you do that more and more, it becomes easier over time, I think.
19:28
Yeah. And then another thing that can help could be like, you can set a time as well. So you can kind of like say, Okay, I'm going to free right, five minutes or three minutes every day because that can help you to, to kind of get some focus, as well. It's like, okay, I've only got three minutes. What do I want to you know, jot it down about, sometimes that can be helpful. But yeah, I think the idea that there isn't anybody like on your shoulder that tells you this is not okay, like it's just you and your pen and paper like nobody can say like He said before, this is not right, or you're not doing it in the right way to you, and it's I think it's a way for you to feel unstuck. You know, when you're so stuck in your thoughts, and, and it feels so happy, it's just like, I've got a place where I can just put all my thoughts and create that distance. And I think once you see your thoughts and feelings on paper, you do feel immediately. Okay, I've got a, you know, you let them go, you know, the burden is kind of like off your shoulder a little bit.
20:29
Yeah, now, I can completely relate to that, that actually journaling has really massively allowed me to kind of process stuff sometimes and just kind of, or sometimes, you know, you write things down. And as you're writing, things become a little bit more clear in your head. And that's really, that's, you know, that's, that can be so useful, because we don't always have or perhaps we don't always want to share things with other people, perhaps we're not always ready. And actually, that pen and paper is, is always sometimes need, right? Just that that that space, actually, for? Yeah, yeah, expressing whatever comes, whatever is coming up for you.
21:08
Absolutely. It's like a friend, you know, if you don't yet if you're not ready to share that it could be like your, your best friend at the time. And I think sort of going back to your question, whereas, you know, he then writes more creatively, like more creative writing, I think that's also that gives you a space to be really, to use your imagination as well, and really create those words and those characters and be fully immersed in those stories. So I also enjoyed that aspect of writing, because it's like, you can just kind of like travel through time and space and just, you know, create your own stories in a different way. So I think it's just yeah, I'm just so passionate about writing and like all the different stories that you can create, whether it's journaling, or, you know, novels, short stories, or a point. And, yeah, I think you can learn so much about yourself through both type of writings. Yeah,
22:01
yeah. Creative Writing isn't something that I am. Particularly fictional writing isn't something that I'm familiar with. But I've always wondered, I think it's, it's interesting, isn't it? Because we kind of put up not to bring this to meet, you know, just to talk about me. But we put certain limitations on ourselves because we say, Oh, no, I'm not a writer, or I couldn't ever be a, you know, a fictional writer as an example. Because x, y, and Zed. And it's interesting, isn't it? Because we just assume these things. And that's what you know, goes with anything, not just writing, but anything in life, sometimes we have those kind of limitations we impose on ourselves without really actually considering where they've come from, or why they're there. And are they real? Because if I don't try something, I can't, I don't know if I'm ever going to be able to do it. Or if I'm going to be any good, or you know, any of these things. Or even if I enjoy doing it, it doesn't have to be good. I don't have to share it with anyone at the end of the day, right? Yeah, I just, I just thought it was. Yeah, it's interesting, because I've always just assumed that no, that's not something I could ever do.
23:18
Yeah, no, I think you can do absolutely anything. And then also remember that when you you know, there are I mean, I did a degree in creative writing. So there are things that you you can learn Absolutely. Like, you know, how to create a stories and what are the fundamentals of a story? You know, it's not just of course, there are so many talented writers, and they have been in the past that were just amazing. But it is something that I mean, there is always a bit of controversial topic here. Some people say that no, you can learn how to be a good writer and other people say, yes, you can, as I'm in the middle here, because it's true, you can learn so much, and that what you do when you you know, when you do a degree or like all those courses in creative writing, you learn and then you kind of like apply those learnings in your writing. So yeah, a little bit like photography as well, you know, then, of course, some people are just naturally talented and other people learn.
24:11
There's a book I read, this reminded me called mindset by Dr. Carol Dweck, if I'm remembering her name correctly. And there's an example of she talks about, you know, fixed and growth mindset and how a lot of the time, particularly when it comes to like artistic things, so you know, creative things like writing, or specifically for example, drawing, she said that a lot of the time people just assume I'm just not talented and drawing, so I can't do it. But there was this example of someone who had to run this course, with people who never really drew and she took them through the fundamentals of drawing and you know what they needed to do, and all of them could draw by the end of it. It was only a few weeks long. Maybe they weren't the best artists in the world, but that that's not the point right? They were able to learn. And so I think actually, sometimes we need to be a little bit more open maybe to kind of like actually, maybe I can, it's just again, it as with anything like this, it's like about the practice of doing it. I think it's like, you've got to, you've got to kind of show up to see where it goes, You can't just assume from the start or after one kind of session, say, actually, this is not for me. If you enjoy it, obviously, if you don't enjoy it, then yeah,
25:29
yeah, like being curious. And don't judge yourself, you know, like practice of mindfulness when
25:33
you do it.
25:36
Be open, curious. And like you said, you know, you might not enjoy it. So okay, you know, it's not for you. Or maybe you find out actually, I really enjoy this. This is an activity that, you know, I can continue, I can learn more. So, yeah, it's just about like applying those, I guess, yeah, a bit of mindfulness in those things as well and see where it takes you. And if it makes you happy doing it or not, but yeah, yeah, we can absolutely do anything. All right. Yeah.
26:03
I do really believe that. It doesn't, you know, we don't have to be. You know, it doesn't have to be a super high standard does that. But I think we have those high expectations to begin with. And that can sometimes be a barrier in itself. Yeah. Yeah. So I wanted to ask, again, led me on to the next question very nicely. I wanted to ask about mindfulness and combining mindfulness and writing together. What do you think are the benefits of doing that? And how, how might we do that?
26:35
Yes. So I always say that, for me, writing and mindfulness go hand in hand, and they can be very powerful for our well being. So there are just so many things that kind of connect within with these two activities. So mindfulness is about like being fully present, and aware of what's going on inside and outside of us being aware of our thoughts, our feelings, our emotions. And it's also about like, you know, as we said before, about slowing down, being curious, being open. And I think, you know, writing is also very similar in that sense that, you know, being curious and being open can help you with your writing, whether you're writing fiction, or whether you're journaling. Because, you know, it's all about like, you know, if you're journaling, you are going to kind of like, check in with yourself, and, you know, and then jot those things down. Whereas if you are maybe writing fiction, then being open in careers can help you, with your characters, when you build your story, as well as you make it more believable. You know, I'm thinking about when we use the senses as well, when we go out for a walk. And I always say, Oh, go for a mindful, walk and use your senses, what can you see? What can you smell, all those things can help you not just to make you feel grounded, and then you can use that in your journaling. But then, if we use this for a more creative writing, aspects, like all those elements can really help to enrich your story in orders, the settings or the characters behaving in a certain way. So if you think about it, like all those things, really complementing each other. And yes, at the end, the activity of writing, I think it is a mindful activity in itself, like even painting, or I go back to like all this creative activities as well, like as much as painting or colouring or drawing, photography, or does mindful activities where you are really immersed in it. And you are really in this, what we call like flow states, when you are so immersed in something that it doesn't really matter what was happening, what happened in the past, or what happens in the future. So, you know, oftentimes, in our day to day, we're kind of like stuck in past and future. And we're never really that present. So but when we are practising those activities, that's where we are in the here. And now, where are we actually ideally, that's where we want to be, you know, because otherwise, it gets very overwhelming and stressful, if we're constantly thinking about, oh, I said that, or I did that, or what am I going to do tomorrow, you know, like, kind of like, all the checklists and all that to do list. So when we are writing, you know, this is where we kind of like, we feel like, okay, you know, all that matters now is just me writing, you know, my thoughts or my stories. And all that matter is that I'm here in the present. I'm enjoying this moment. So, and yeah, mindfulness is about like the present moment and enjoying the moment without kind of like judging ourselves without necessarily having a goal in mind like this, like we said before, like, we don't have to always have that expectation. It's just about I'm here now. I can slow down, or that matters is the hearing now, basically.
29:50
Yeah.
29:51
I'm curious how or whether you've noticed kind of an increase in people's interest in mindfulness and perhaps Writing as well over the last year, whether you've noticed kind of a bit of a spike,
30:06
yeah, I think I've done like loads of. So I had to pivot, like, I only managed to do one workshops in real life. And then everything was kind of like pivoted online, which was a bit scary at the beginning, because I was like, Oh, I don't know how it's going to translate the real, you know, kind of a face to face interaction. But then, because of the particular moment that we were living, I, I Oh, I kind of like After a few moments, when I started the workshop, I knew that, okay, women really need that because they were so they just wanted to share, they just wanted to talk about what was going on for them. And they just really needed that moment of, you know, what, I just need to really disconnect and leave, like all this heavy stuff that are happening, and just take a moment for myself. And they all sat there like in different in different ways, for different reasons, they all needed that space for themselves to reconnect with themselves, their mind their body, kind of like discovering what was going on for them, because I think both writing and mindfulness can help you to really discover a bit more about yourself. And also see if there are any patterns, you know, sometimes we tend to do the same things and reacting to situations or things the same way. And when you jot down those things when you track those things, you know, and then you can go back and you're like, Oh, yeah, I tend to do this all the time. And, you know, actually doing this all the time makes me feel not that great. So maybe where can I adjust? You know, maybe next time, I won't react the same way and see what happens. So yeah, I felt like there was this need for women to have these spaces for themselves to be more mindful to just meditate, and also write down what was going on before them.
31:54
Yeah, I can see how, yeah, just making time for that would be so just so important, actually, over the past 12 What are we up to Matt in 15 months now? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. So I wanted to ask, so we we kind of chatted about this briefly, before we hit record, we talked about you going part time in your employed role, and managing the two. So managing that part time role with your with running of your business? How are you? How are you finding that? And how are you adjusting to that, because I know that well run, you know, working full time and running us as a business on the side is, is super busy. But running things, you know, alongside each other, where you've got two separate things to focus on can actually be really tricky. You know, even from my switching the focus from one to the other, and, and all that kind of stuff. So I'm curious how that's going and how you're managing? Yeah, how are you managing the team?
32:58
Yeah, it's a really good question. Yeah, cuz we were talking about this before. And I said, I feel like sometimes we don't talk enough about this topic, like about actually managing two things at the same time. And we always talk about them, you know, actually, when people take the leap of faith, and then they've kind of like now in their own, like, just running their own business and, and have, they've made it and I said to you, like, I'm always interested in the in between stories, like, okay, but what happened? Like, how did you get there? And how did you feel when you were running two things at the same time, because that is incredibly hard. And I think also, if you don't have like, the support the right support, like and network as well, that can help you at times, it can be really tricky, you know, I am learning things every day, you're like, I'm still trying to navigate these transition periods. as well. It's not easy. Yeah, like you said, as well. It's also having my feel like my brain has to switch from one job to the other. And sometimes that's not easy. And also when I work on women make stories, I feel like I have so many ideas, I feel like super creative, sometimes my brain never switches off from there as well. So I feel inspiration is everywhere. For me, like I feel so receptive, and can be like a blessing. But sometimes it can also be a bit too much. It's like Oh, just switch off. Like, I don't want to think about it now just want to go for a walk. And that's it, you know, and I think sometimes it's also about reminding myself that I am when I work on women make stories like I can make my own decision. You know, it's my business because I think there is also this element of kind of a corporate environment and mentality that you cannot bring with you, which is not helpful at all. So you know, that mentality or you always have to be on you always have to be productive and and I'm trying to kind of like, move away from that and In my business and just go back to it's my business, if, you know, my priority will always be my well being as well. And the well being of the women I work with. So if I'm not 100%, I can't really deliver, you know, that to the women I work with. So that's really important for me as well. So I'm still trying to, you know, navigate that. But I would say, it's not easy. And I knew, especially, actually, when I was working full time, it was even worse, because it was even, it was harder. And, and I think that was the time when I like burnt out for the first time, because he was just, it was just too much he was in such a big challenge. And of course, I felt grateful that I had like that stable income that actually helped me with, you know, I don't know, doing my first photo shoot, or you know, all the things that can help you in your business. So you do feel grateful for that. But that doesn't mean it's less of a challenge. So I think this is where I'm at, like, I'm trying to navigate set boundary with it. But yeah, I would say it is it is a struggle, but I'm really keen to hear from other women as well. I think now we've started this conversation, it would be really interesting to see hear from other women and their stories and how they're navigating this as well. Yeah,
36:19
yeah, I think you make such a good point that she, you know, it can be challenging, as much as it can be exciting. And like you say, you've got lots of inspiration coming in, and you feel really kind of excited about the ideas that you've got for your business. Obviously, there are time limitations, there's only so many hours in the day. And sometimes it can feel like, you know, maybe, maybe that's just my own point of view. But sometimes I feel like I'm going too slow, because I've got all these different things that I want to be getting on with. And actually, I think what you said earlier is, you know, reminding ourselves that we can, we're in control, we're able to make the decisions that actually are kind of going to suit us in terms of our you know, well being and everything else as well. Because if we're not 100%, we're not showing up in a way that we want to then so yeah, so really being mindful of the fact that it's not a race and that we you know, we've got all the time in the world. And so yeah, and I think that is one of the hardest things when you're really excited about your business and where it can go, but actually having to pace yourself a little bit, because you know, that she you know, there's only so many hours, and you've got the other work to kind of show up for as well.
37:38
Yeah, so you've kind of I have to do is your energy as well. And, yeah, I would say always put your well being and your mental health at first, because then you just, you know, you're just going to suffer in the end if you if you can't actually protect that space for yourself. And I think like you said, there is also this pressure because of, I would say like social media, like the blessing and the curse of social media, like, you know, when we see other business, you know, constantly putting out stuff and you know, when you also have to juggle different things at the same time. And it can be like another work or family or you know, whatever commitment you have. And then you go on social and you see that you see that everybody's doing great, then, of course, you don't know what goes behind closed doors. But that sometimes can be a bit tricky as well, because you just feel like I need to, like I said before, just constantly do things and I'm a bit behind. And so yeah, it's just a reminder of you drew you, and you take all the time that you need, you know, you're on a different path. It's your path. And yeah, just kind of like you're in control. And this is why you also wanted to create this business, right? That's why I wanted to create my business because I was burnt out and I just wanted to kind of like, create something that suited me and my lifestyle. So it's important in that then I go back to that. And it's like, okay, you know, I'm actually I just want to slow down here. So, yeah, that's important as well.
39:03
Yeah, yeah, I think it takes a bit of time. And to be honest, you know, I'm a few years and running my business full time. And I run it alongside a full time job for a while as well, for a few years, there is a continuous like adjustment. And you know, you kind of continuously have to be reminded or remind yourself that she Okay, let's bring it back to basics. How do I want to feel and what did I want this to actually look like? Is it? Are we close? Or are my veering off, like too far down the path that I didn't actually, you know, and you talked about that kind of corporate conditioning and I think it takes a very long time, I think to kind of let go of the notion of like things even the simplest of things like working a nine to five and taking any time out. Yeah, within that window because it feels like well, I should be working so why why am I off doing something else? So yeah, it's just yeah. I think it's that constant reminder that we need, isn't it?
40:03
Yeah, absolutely. Just a constant reminder. Like, yes. No, you're you're doing just fine. You're are doing exactly what you need to do just at your own pace.
40:14
Yeah, absolutely.
40:16
Okay, so as we are coming kind of towards the end of the interview, I'm curious if there is one tip that you could give your younger self? And what would it be?
40:30
Good question. Um, I think I would tell young Daniella, see, always follow our hearts and our intuition. And to take other people's advice with a pinch of salt. Because I think, if I look back at my own story can see, of course, it's always different. When you look back, you have that knowledge, right, that you didn't have at the time. So you have to be gentle with yourself at the time, you only knew what you knew at the time. But looking back now, I can see so many occasions, so many episodes, where I knew and I could feel in my heart and in my gut, what I wanted to do, but then I ended up following what other people wanted me too. And of course, that didn't really go very well, in the end. Because it was a bit of a forced decision. You know, I wasn't really following my path. But those mistakes were also lessons. So I think I've learned a lot from there from those things. So yeah, I think it's so important to follow our heart and our intuition, because ultimately, we know what's best for us. And I think when we create, you know, a life that kind of like, aligns with our values, and what's important for us, that's where we really boom, if you know if that makes sense, because we are so aligned, we just create our life and a career that mirrors what we really what's important for us. And I think, yeah, it's just like, I would always want to encourage women to to follow their heart and their intuition, I think it's just so important. And I think when we don't do it, we suffer. And we can feel it. I mean, I'm very physical. So I know that when I do something that doesn't really align with, with myself, or my values, or I just, I really suffer, like my body tells me that, and then sometimes we suppress that we bury that a little bit. Because we feel scared or, you know, we feel maybe other people would judge us or, you know, whatever is going on in our life. But I think, you know, we know what we want in our heart, I can it's kind of like it's screaming, do this, you know, I'm here, I'm telling you, all of you follow your heart Follow me. And I think sometimes all the answers are actually within ourselves. They're not in other people. And so we I think it's important that we believe in ourselves. And that we know that we have everything within ourselves, like, oh, the tools are there. Sometimes we just need and it takes a little bit longer, because we need to unlock all those things. But we absolutely have everything within ourselves. It's just a matter of like, I believe in myself, I know what I'm doing, and believing in these things that I'm trying to create. And I'm just gonna go for it, you know?
43:13
Yeah, I think it can take a bit of time to get to that point, right? Because if you've lived your life, never really checking in with what feels right to you. Or always ignoring that kind of gut feeling like you've, you know, talked about the you had quite strong physical kind of reactions, perhaps, but still, for whatever reason, you know, perhaps didn't listen to it. I think it takes Yeah, and again, just being kind of gentle with ourselves when we do that, that knowing that it's not always easy if you've we've never done it before, to kind of to follow that voice. And to sometimes take that leap of faith in a sense, because it yeah, it can feel very, kind of alien to us if you've never done it before.
44:00
Yeah, yeah. It's not easy. To follow your intuition and your heart that Yeah, because you know, when you're always kind of like, this path, and you always like, listen to other people, and then you feel like condition or pressure to do certain things. It's not easy at all. But I think it's important, because at the end of the day, it's our life. Yeah. And we have to live it and make the best of it for ourselves, you know, and we can't just follow other people just because they want us to be this way, or they want us to do you know, this job or this career, like it's just we are the only one that are going to suffer in the end. And I think, you know, I think other people say, Oh, I don't really know how to like, if my intuition is talking to me, I think it's just a matter of like, actually sitting down and trying ways to connect, we connect with it because I think our intuition and our heart always speaks to us. It's just about letting them speak a bit more louder. And I think like you said, when we're so I used to bury them. It's easy, but that voice is always there. It's just about, you know what, I'm going to trust that voice now. Because Yeah, I think you know what's best for you. That's like, my colour of my mantra. It's, it's true. You know, we only know when when we feel uncomfortable or when we feel forced, and how that makes us feel in our body and in our minds, you know, and you don't want to leave like that. You know?
45:25
Yeah. Very wise words. Thank you. Okay, so where can people find you?
45:33
Yeah, that's my question. Okay,
45:36
so people can find me on Instagram and Facebook, I'm more active on Instagram, trying to be as active on Facebook. But yeah, my handle is that women make stories and I love chatting to women. So yeah, feel free to say hello in my dm. And of course, like all the information, also about like women make stories are on my website, as well to swimming nextdoor.com. So I also do workshops, and also one to one sessions, which is a new offerings, basically an eight week programme, let's call it this way when we go through all the fundamentals of mindfulness, and also how you can introduce mindfulness into your life. And then I we've been the writing as well. So it's always like a combination of writing and mindfulness, but it's more of a personalised journey. So we kind of like have a first call when we get to know each other. And, you know, we speak about, like, all the things that maybe you want to work on, and then I kind of like creates a personalised programme. And yet the most important things for me when we do this one to one is just that women feel like they know, they learn, like all the little things in which they can introduce mindfulness into their life, like, it doesn't necessarily have to be 30 minutes of meditation, you know, you just start slowly, and also pick and choose the things that realistically you can include in your day to day because otherwise, if it doesn't feel something that you can actually do, you know, in the long run, then you just want an end up doing it. So it's like, all those little and gentle steps that can actually yeah, make you do more mindfulness and writing.
47:10
Yeah, and I love how I can, I can see how how much accountability that can give as well having that one to one kind of space, to explore what's coming up and to work through that with different practices together, but also having that kind of gentle accountability of knowing that,
47:25
you know,
47:26
you're there to support someone through that journey as they, as they explore mindfulness, perhaps, you know, sometimes for the first time as well.
47:34
Yeah, yeah. And like if they have any questions, or if anything comes up, because I, I appreciate that, you know, sometimes when we meditate or rides, certain emotions come up as well. So, you know, you still have a lot actually that sometimes you haven't, you know, you start a meditation, you don't even know where your mind is. And then all of a sudden, well, where is this coming from? Where is this emotional memory coming from? So you need that space as well to reflect and I think that's very important. And you know, one to one, of course, you have a bit more time to explore that. And to see like this patterns as well. So yeah, it's a special special moment. Yeah, I can imagine.
48:13
Okay, so thank you so much for joining me today. So it's women make stories.com that people can find all of the information. Yes. Brilliant. Thank you so much for your time. Thank you. Thanks so much.